The First Day

 

 

I woke to the sound of the alarm on my cell phone having already slept through the double alarm on my digital clock that sits on the night stand next to my bed.  It’s Monday and my first day back to work from a 9-day lockout. I wasn’t on a vacation ( I still have 40 hours of PTO reserved for that kind of fun ), instead I was in another state attending my only child’s wedding.   He’s younger than I was when I married, but I get the feeling he’s a lot smarter and knows more about being a good husband than I ever did about being a good wife.

The day after the wedding, friends and family started posting pictures on Facebook and I devoured them up like a kid at a candy store and then I found that chocolate covered coconut piece of candy that makes you gasp in surprise and disgust.  The pictures of me.  I had become the middle-aged heavy set woman who knows she’s overweight but is in totally denial about just how far she has let herself go.

After a long day and night of self-loathing and self-pitying, I made a decision to change the path I was on.  Thus, here I am Monday morning, groaning at the reality of having to give up my slumber and remembering the promises I had made to myself as I drifted off to sleep the night before.  Today was the day I started to change things up.

 

6 a.m. – I snoozed the alarm, wanting another five minutes, but my mind was already starting its morning prep work and I knew it was time to begin.

 

I weighed myself first thing.  307lbs.  Kicking the smoking habit had been rough on my weight and I knew it would be, but it still surprises me to see that high number flashing at me.

 

6:15 a.m. – Coffee  with a dollop of flavored creamer ( I’m NOT giving up my coffee ).

 

7:45 a.m. – stopped at the local convenience store for another coffee and a breakfast sandwich. I went with an omelet wrapped in a tortilla with a sticker on it boasting that it only had 220 calories.

 

Work is in an office where I sit for the entire 8hour shift answering phones and working on the computer.  Obviously I’m not getting exercise with this position so I made a point of getting up and walking around a little while on the phone ( Thank God for wireless headsets! )

 

12 p.m. –  I was actually looking forward to the salad I had gotten at the store when I bought breakfast.

 

2 p.m. – I read somewhere that you should drink water if you think you’re hungry because most times you’re thirsty but your body likes to send you mixed signals.   I wasn’t thirsty.

 

3 p.m.  – I am foraging  in my desk and eyeing the clock.  I found dry cereal in the break room and poured about a cup of it into a coffee filter ( as a container, nothing more ).

 

6:30 p.m. – serving of boiled potatoes, small steak and a ton of salad.  I’m feeling kind of proud of the day so far.

 

7 p.m. – 10 p.m.  – I’ve done three loads of laundry, power cleaned the kitchen, vacuumed the living room, finished the book I was reading and started converting some video files.

 

10 p.m. – there is a polish sausage in the refrigerator.  I’m eating it.

 

11:30 p.m. –  Day One is complete.