Category: Emotional Well-Being

Posted in Emotional Well-Being, Encouragement/Motivation

Let’s Talk About Your Self-Esteem

Posted on by HeatherLynn

                  In the journey of improving oneself, healthier eating choices and exercise are always on the top of the list.  What we tend to neglect to factor in this journey is how our self-esteem affects our journey.

                 Self-esteem is how we perceive and value ourselves.  It walks hand-in-hand with self-confidence.  This perception is influenced by society, by our peers, our families, and most importantly of all, ourselves.     That inner voice that lives inside of us has immense power. 

                 A healthier lifestyle will help boost your self-esteem, but only if you learn how to change your perceptions.  Its not easy.  You are battling a lifetime of negative inner talk.  Standing in front of the mirror berating yourself for every little flaw & allowing others to make you feel like you were less than.   Those days must come to an end.

                 How do you improve your self-esteem and get your self-confidence to an acceptable level? 

  1. Get to know who you are.   What makes you happy?  Do you enjoy going to the beach and collecting shark’s teeth?  Do you like going to thrift shops and finding that perfect vintage item?    Start doing what YOU want to do.  
  • Challenge every unkind thought you have about yourself.   If you think “I’m terrible at baking cookies.”   Find a video with step-by-step instructions, take a class.      If you start to make remarks about your physical appearance, reprimand yourself like you would a child for speaking that way to another person.    Its appalling how we talk to ourselves.
  • Say positive things to yourself.   Every morning look at yourself in the mirror and say one positive thing.   “You have pretty eyes; I like your hair…”  If you aren’t feeling it, still try to pull it off, “You don’t look as tired as you feel.”     Do not allow that inner voice to ruin you.
  • Practice saying “no”.    You don’t have to go along with the crowd, you don’t have to tag along with your spouse to every car show.  You are no one’s servant and you are your own person.   If you don’t want to do something, speak up.   Its liberating. 
  • Try not to compare yourself to others.  Everyone is different, everyone is fighting their own battle.   As Facebook has taught us, people only share their shining moments, and they hide   the things that haunt them in the night.   Worry about yourself, stay in your own lane. 
  • Choose your battles but don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself.   No one deserves to be walked all over, no matter what the situation is.   The more you allow things to happen because you don’t want to have an argument, the more you lose a piece of yourself.   Speak up and get it out on the table.
  • Find new things to try.  The more things you learn to do, the more confident you become.  Take a class on basket weaving, do a paint and sip night, visit a random museum you’ve never been to. 
  • This is probably the most important step.   Change your inner voice from a Negative Nellie to a Positive Polly.   This one takes some work, but the more you stop it from speaking negative to you and change it to talking positive, the more confident you will feel.   The scale numbers aren’t moving as you wish.    Instead of the inner voice berating you, have it say to you, “It’s okay, we just need to change up the formula a bit.  You can do this! “  

Remember, this is a journey, not a sprint!   If you stumble its okay!  Pick yourself up, dust off, and start walking again!

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Posted in Emotional Well-Being, Encouragement/Motivation

Slow and Steady for Success

Posted on by HeatherLynn

                 This morning, I read an article about a TikTok influencer who claims to have lost 100 lbs. in four months.  As I read the comments of people congratulating her and giving her kudos for a job well done, all I could think was, “You did it wrong.” 

                 Allow me to explain.   While losing unwanted weight quickly is exactly what every overweight person dreams of, there are some downsides to such quick results you would need to consider.

#1 – The health risk.  One of the most common paths to rapid weight loss is by exercising excessively and following a “crash” diet or a very low-calorie diet of 800 calories or fewer.   These methods can cause muscle atrophy, fatigue, gallstones, hair loss, bone density issues, constipation, electrolyte imbalance, and slower immune functions.  This is because of the sudden reduced calorie intake and very often a lack of daily nutrients your body needs to function properly.

#2 – Nearly everyone who follows a diet regain half the weight they’ve lost after one year, and nearly all the weight back by 3-5 years.    Why is that?   The weight came off so fast there was little time to build a new healthy habit.  Psychologically, it takes 18 to 254 days to create a habit, 66 days to incorporate the habit into your daily life.    When you are going for the rapid weight loss, you are not creating a new lifestyle for yourself, you are merely temporarily addressing the issue.

Most experts suggest losing weight as a slow and steady pace.  Losing one to two pounds a week is acceptable.  

The odds of maintaining the weight loss will multiply.   Don’t look at it as a “diet”, that messes with your head.  Start looking at it as a lifestyle change because that is exactly what you are doing.  

Eat more protein – protein can help boost your metabolism, keeping you feeling fuller for longer periods of time and preserving your muscle mass.

Cut back on sugar and starches – This reduces your carb intake.  I know you love bread but take it easy!

Eat slowly – your stomach takes awhile to send the message to your brain that it’s hit capacity.  If you eat a bit slower, you’ll realize that you’re full before you go over the limit. 

Watch your Portions – today, portions are nearly three times what they were in the 1950’s.   Get a scale, a child’s portion plate, measure cups… do what you need to do to make sure your portions are controlled.    If you go to a restaurant, take a container with you and before you take a bite, put at least half your meal in your container to take home for tomorrow’s lunch.

Try some resistance training – those weight machines in the gym are your friends now. 

Toss in some cardio – walking, running, dancing, just keep moving.

STOP LISTENING TO INFLUENCERS   – they just want you to follow them, they don’t care if their advice is good or bad.  

Finally… Believe in yourself.  This is your journey.  Its not a race.  Slow and steady and you’ll be looking at a brand new you in a few months with a brand-new outlook on life.   

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Posted in Emotional Well-Being, Encouragement/Motivation

Sitting in a Booth

Posted on by HeatherLynn

For the past twenty years, I have dreaded going to a restaurant and being seated in a booth.  It literally caused me anxiety when I was led by an unassuming waitperson to what appeared to be simple booth.  In my mind’s eye, though, I was seeing at minimum, thirty minutes of torture.   The heavier I became, the worse the torture.  Squeezing my bulging belly in there and having to sit for those uncomfortable minutes while pretending nothing was wrong.  It hurt to breath, it hurt to move and let’s not even talk about my generous top half that refused to get out of the way.   Thankfully I have a partner who is very understanding and would graciously take a table if I spoke up and said something.   I didn’t say anything in the beginning, but I learned to speak up and say something to both him and to my waitperson when they asked, “Booth okay?”   No, a booth is not okay, look at me. Do I look like I would fit in one of those torture chambers?  Please don’t do that to me.  

    It was just one of the many things about being overweight I had to accept and adjust my life around.   People with a healthier lifestyle may never understand such frustration and embarrassment of not fitting properly in a restaurant booth, but believe me, its there.  It ranks right up with not being able to ride on a roller coaster because the restraints won’t click in because there’s just too much bulk of you; or not fitting into a chair with arms comfortably because your extra thigh girth has no where to go so you feel like you’ve been forced like a square peg in a round hole.     The list of weight issues that are not health related is long and varied, and anyone who is overweight tends to just suck it up and live with that silently.  We know.  We see other people being able to do what we cannot and we mentally beat ourselves up and then comfort ourselves with something sugary or deep-fried.  At that point we feel even worse so we decide to try once again to get healthier and we jump into another attempt to shed the pounds.  We might do well for a week or two, then we start to falter.  Something happens and we stumble and the comfort foods do what they have always done for us, they bring us comfort.   It is a horrible cycle.

                            It is liberating to break the cycle.

Finding the right course of action on your journey to a healthier you is like breaking out of prison.   You begin to see the world differently.   The old fears are still there and you are in disbelief that anything has actually changed.  Then you step into that restaurant and the only available seating is a booth.   Gulp!   You slid in and …. There are actually inches of space between you and the edge of the table!  INCHES!      It was at this very point in my journey that I knew I was going to be successful.   Up until that point, I was skeptical, despite what the scale was reading.  

Don’t give up on yourself.  Look forward to the inches of air between you and the edge of the table.  

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Posted in Emotional Well-Being, intermittent-fasting

The Cons of Intermittent Fasting

Posted on by HeatherLynn

When you hear about Intermittent Fasting, you’ll be presented with the benefits. The weight loss, the heart healthy and lower cholesterol to name a few. However, for many on the fence, there are some hard and fast doubts of their own success and for good reason. The fears are just another fancy way of saying “Cons” when it comes to Intermittent Fasting.

Increased Feelings of hunger – absolutely 100% true. Your brain is hardwired to eat at certain times of the day and suddenly you are switching things up. There is going to be an argument about it. I once read somewhere that when you are super hungry, drink a glass of water first. If you are still hungry after drinking the water, drink another glass. If you are still hungry then you are legit hungry and its not dehydration driving your hunger pangs. With intermittent fasting though, keep drinking the water until the fast is over, you are going to have to get into that mind set.

Heightened Irritability / worsened mood – 100% true… the first week or two. Again, you are challenging years of habits and there is going to be some feedback. Women are especially familiar with the way heightened irritability works thanks to our experiences with the monthly raging hormones. You’ll be ok, this does not last. The good news is that once you get in your groove and get over that hump, your mood starts to improve greatly.

Increased thoughts about food – this just makes sense. You are knowingly depriving yourself. Just like on a “diet” you feel like you are sacrificing so you feel like all you think about is food! This comes and goes. Some days you are in great shape, some days you are struggling. The important thing is to hold fast to your goal and wait for the fast to end.

Fatigue – only in the beginning. While your body adjusts to the new pattern, its going to want to rest. As the scale slowly starts dropping the numbers, you’ll notice there is a new spring in your step and energy to keep moving where before you just wanted to sit and scroll through social media posts wishing you had more get up and go.

Feeling out of control around food/ overeating during eating windows – this one is going to be something you will always have to consciously be aware of. When you do eat, concentrate on healthy choices, avoid the fast food and processed foods. During your eating window, prep your meals, make a game plan for when you are out around other people and their food. There will be times that you will give in, just take 1/4 of what you would have done in the past. Take a container with you to restaurants and before you take a bite, put 1/2 of the meal in your to-go container so you don’t overeat ( restaurants are very generous with portions ). And above all, keep your Fasting Buddy on speed-dial/text so you can let them know you are feeling vulnerable. A good Fasting Buddy will talk you off the ledge and help you make a smart choice, reminding you of your ultimate goal.

All of these “cons” are perfectly normal, and if you choose to venture into Intermittent Fasting, you need to understand that the cons will not magically go away. They will hang around and poke up when you least expect.

Despite all the cons, the benefits and results are simply amazing. The feeling of accomplishment, when you see the scale finally begin to move after years of going the wrong way, is enough to outweigh any fear you might have.