Tag: mental-health

Posted in Emotional Well-Being, Encouragement/Motivation

Pain in the Journey

Posted on by HeatherLynn

Pain.  It is a factor in your journey that will provide a frustrating stumbling block you will feel helpless to overcome.  When you are in chronic or severe pain from an injury, you may want to literally feed that pain.   They call this “maladaptive pain-related coping”.   The term “maladaptive” refers to behaviors or actions that hinder an individual’s ability to adapt or adjust to different situations differently.  ( I hope we have BOTH learned something new today!) 

Overeating in response to pain is basically just a coping mechanism.  It makes you temporarily feel better.  Psychologically, deep down, there is this primitive need to fuel up to replace the energies you are exerting as your body attempts to heal the injury.  

This leads, obviously, to over-eating, knocking you off the journey you’ve worked so hard on, landing on a plateau and falling back into a sea of frustration.  It can be a dangerous time for you as you risk falling back into old habits since your resolve is distracted by the pain.   

There are some things you can do to help. 

1.  Be careful and don’t hurt yourself.   I know, great wisdom coming from the Queen of Klutz.  If I am not injured then something is certainly wrong!   

2.  Don’t suffer through the pain. Get to a medical professional and get the help you need.  

4. Bulk up on the antioxidants. Fresh, leaf vegetables and fruits with complex carbs are much better than simple sugars.  

5. Keep moving as much as you can.  Depending on the injury of course.   Take frequent breaks. 

6. Get plenty of sleep.  Your body repairs itself quite a bit during those hours.  

Ice is your friend when it comes to injuries.  Inflammation is what is causing most of that pain and ice packs greatly alleviate the discomfort.  

Here are some foods you can partake of , that also reduce inflammation :  

Whole Grains :   whole grain bread, oats, brown rice, barly, quinoa, couscous, polenta,     bulgur, and rye bread.  Also stick with multi-grain or wheat pasta.  

Beans,nuts, seeds, pod foods :  peas, edamame, black beans, kidney beans, chickpeas,        white beans,  hummus, walnuts, almonds, pecans,        peanuts, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, pinenuts etc. :  

Fruits : berries, pomegranates, cherries. Darker colored fruits are especially good.  Avoid     fruit juices.  

Vegetables : yellow, orange and red peppers and tomatoes, Spinach, chard, kale, leaf            lettuce, romaine lettuce, arugula, mixed greens (focus on dark leafy greens)                   Purple and green cabbage, onions, garlic, broccoli, brussels sprouts,            cauliflower, radishes, cucumbers, green beans and green onions. 

Olive Oil:  replace butter and other oils with this for cooking. 

Fish : Go for cold water fish like salmon, herring, anchovies, sardines and mackerel. 

White Meat ;  chicken, turkey and other birds.  No frying or deep frying.  

Dairy: Eggs, natural cheese ( not processed ), low-fat milk, yogurt.  

Herbs ;  cinnamon, ginger, turmeric, garlic, rosemary, cayenne, pepper, black pepper. 

Honestly, looking at the list of “anti-inflammatory” foods, it is not much different than how you should be customizing your diet on a regular basis when you are not in pain.   

Above all, know that an injury does not mean your journey has come to an end.  This is just a setback.   The hard work is not in the physical, its in the mental.  You are going to have to mentally pick yourself up and get yourself back into the driver’s seat and start walking again.   How long will you sit on the side of the road using your pain as the reason you have failed?    

Day five – My Journey Phase 2  

Posted in Emotional Well-Being, intermittent-fasting

I am my own Enemy

Posted on by HeatherLynn

Does Fasting Work?   That’s the one question I am asked frequently.  My answer… its the ONLY thing that has worked for me.   I have tried many variations of fad diets, portion control and calorie counting, and it all ended with me being frustrated.  Honestly, even the Intermittent Fasting brought me to the point of frustration, and I had to sit down and have a hard look at things. 

All my life I have identified as the “fat girl”, the “chubby woman”, the girl with love handles and jiggly thighs.   That’s who I know and that is who society knows.  I am accustomed to a certain way of deference from others… subtle judging glances as I fill my grocery cart,  not so subtle stares as I chuff by in my shorts that insist on riding up the inside of my thighs forcing me to do the awkward pull and leg shake to fix the problem.  I admit, I am most likely only imagining most of this, people are very self-absorbed and have no interest in those around them while in public.   However, being out there, I have always been very aware of how large I am.    It’s like the times I’ve gone in the woman’s section to look at clothes and I just “knew” the women there were asking themselves why I thought I was going to find anything at all that would fit me in that section.  I was up here in the first class, and I needed to get my rotund butt back over to lower-class where the sold the clothes by square foot.   

I dropped 80lbs.  People were smiling more at me.   I was getting appreciative looks and direct eye-contact.    My cart had fresh veggies and fruits in it and not a single item of junk food or sugar.   I was still very aware of being out there, but now it felt amazing!  I was lighter and moving quicker and it was like being on a sort of natural high.    I was actually achieving a goal I had only dreamed of for decades!  

Then the self-saboteur came knocking.    She looks like me, the “old” me.   She told me things like, “Its cool to back off on the fasting a bit now, you got this” and she would look at the clock and shrug, “two scoops of ice cream at 9 pm isn’t going to kill you”.    I was oblivious to her tactics, I still felt good, although I admit my energy wasn’t quite the same.  Then I was watching more tv and finding excuses to sit down rather than get up and move around.    My weight loss stopped.   It went beyond a plateau, it came to a screeching halt, tires squealing.    I gave half-hearted attempts to return to my patterns but my “get up and go” was gone.     Jumping into the mix came a back injury, an excuse not to move much, but also a discovery that when i am in severe pain, I EAT.    

I wasn’t gaining, but I wasn’t losing.   Ten months down the road and I hurt my shoulder.  More pain and realization that things are not going my way at all.   This time I sat down and had a chat with my doctor.   It was obvious that I had lost my motivation and in our discussion we both agreed that I had sabotaged myself.    The question is WHY???   I don’t have the full answer, not yet.   I’m still working on that part.   I think part of it is that I suddenly didn’t know my part anymore.   After decades of being the “fat girl” , I wasn’ t her any longer and it threw me for a curve.    That’s something I’ll need to work on. 

In the meantime,  I am back on track with my Intermittent Fasting.   My doctor visit was the motivation I needed to get me back.   I don’t want to go back to where I was.  The only option is to pick myself up and keep moving forward.  

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Posted in Emotional Well-Being, Encouragement/Motivation

TABLETOP-PLATEAU

Posted on by HeatherLynn

Plateaus are a part of the journey.   Plateaus are expected, but they should not last any major length of time, after all, they would be called something much more discerning if they were expected to be lengthy.     

I climbed up on a table-top plateau back in September.    I then leapt over to another table-top, and another and another. It became just an endless row of tabletops with a few low hills but no major hikes or drops in elevation.    Of that, I should be grateful, I haven’t been climbing, but the frustration of not dropping can be daunting. 

What happened?   Body changes?  Environment?   Psychological?    Perhaps all of that.    I got in my own head and lost my motivation.  Not completely, but it’s certainly not where it was a year ago and that is the key to the lack of my recent success.   

I can give excuses.  Justification is a skill I honed years ago while shoveling piles of unhealthy foods into my mouth and claiming one thing or another was the cause of my woes.   The only one I would be fooling is myself, and not very well.     

I know I am to blame.   I start each morning focused.   I do well UNLESS I am not active.   If I am moving around cleaning, doing chores, tending to my flock of birds or simply just walking, I am fine.   A bottle of water or a cup of hot coffee is all that I seem to need.   However, I do not have the type of career that is considered active, and I find myself looking at a computer screen early in the day.   Within the first hour, my stomach growls and I successfully ignore it for about two hours and then I give in.   Because I am weak.   No, that’s just an excuse.   The reason is because I was weak before I ever arrived at work.   I either tossed a bag of grapes into my work bag or I stopped purposely to grab a fruit cup from the local convenience store on my way in.  

So, what really happened?   I happened.   I started feeling really good about what I looked like, and I stumbled.  I let up on myself and quit being so disciplined.  I treated myself one too many times, gave myself a “break” too often and now here I am.   I feel the pressure from myself to keep trying.  I’m not at the goal I’ve set and until I reach that goal, I have to keep pushing.    

My eating habits are a little skewed right now.   I have been portioning out too much, indulging in the starches and giving in to the sweet tooth.   Talk about the three major roadblocks on getting off the table!   Now that the weather is beginning to move to the warmer side of things. Well, at least some days of the week it is.   I’ll be outside more, which means I’ll be more active.   The days are getting longer which means I’ll be finding things to do to keep busy.   Sitting on the couch when its still daylight feels “lazy” to me and I can’t do lazy.   Not if I want to reach my goal.      

Motivational Plan for the week:   

BE MINDFUL OF MY MEALS 

BE ACTIVE IN THE DAYLIGHT 

DRINK MORE WATER 

I think those are three achievable goals for my week.   I think I need to write down every time I use an excuse for deviating from the plan and what the excuse is.   I find journaling a difficult task because you must be honest and writing it down makes it very real.    

Fourth step for the week:  Journal your Justifications.  

To all on this journey, it’s important to know that with the success also comes the roadblocks, the things that make you want to fall back into the old habits.   You’ve come too far to fall back into the old habits. Stay strong and know that you are amazing, and you have the power to get through!  

Posted in Emotional Well-Being, Encouragement/Motivation

2025 The Pilgrimage Continues

Posted on by HeatherLynn

It is the final day of the year marking the end of one of the many legs of the journey to happier, healthier lifestyle.   To say it has been fraught with mishaps and complications would be dead-on accurate.   This journey, like life itself, will never be problem free and I accept that.  The unexpected will happen, the diversions, the temptations, the doubts and misgivings.   All that matters is that I have emerged at this end better than what I plunged in at!  

I am looking forward to continuing this journey.  Can I still call it a journey or is it something more epic now?  Should I call it more a like a personal pilgrimage?  Whatever I refer to this as, it is certainly a new way of life.     

What does the next twelve months have in store for me?  I honestly cannot tell you.   I can share with you my hopes, my goals, my intentions, and then life is going to step in and let me know what really is going to happen.   I accept that, this is why I do not make New Year’s Resolutions.   I understand there are just too many variables in my life that can throw me off track.  

This is what I’ll do :

  1. Recognize my weaknesses –   when I travel/visit relatives/ social gatherings   I have a lot of trouble staying on point with my eating habits.    I also found that I like to bake, but cannot resist the temptation of testing my results so I need to refrain from that activity.    
  1. Keep my Focus –   remind myself daily the reasoning behind my journey and the way I feel now verses the way I felt before starting.   
  1. Use the Apps – there are apps to help with Fasting, Tracking Exercise, Logging Food, and nearly anything you can think of.  USE THEM RELIGIOUSLY 
  1. Exercise at minimum 15-20 minutes a day.   This means a brisk walk if nothing else.   You should be trying to do more a few times a week, but the daily 15 is better than nothing at all.    
  1. Adhere to your schedule –  I drifted from my fasting schedule a few times and I’ve paid the price with a stubborn plateau.   Stick to your schedule.  
  1. Don’t let other people’s bad habits take you off course. –   If you live with someone who isn’t 100% supportive,  that is on them.   Stick to your guns and if they wish to eat and practice habits that do not coincide with your journey, do not enable them by getting them their “fixes” { junk food; processed food; candy; etc }  
  1. Look in the mirror every morning and give yourself a smile and say “Good Morning! Let’s do this! “  

HAPPY NEW YEAR!  

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Posted in Emotional Well-Being

Reflection Perceptions

Posted on by HeatherLynn

When I was a teen, I was not in the popular clique.  I was one of those girls who wanted to be a part of their world, and I wanted to be like them, instead I was this socially awkward girl who had always just “known” she was different.   I was the fourth square in the famed Sesame Street four-square skit “one of these things is not like the other”.    And they were all well aware of it.   They had a lot of different names for me, but the ones that really carried with me were those that pertained to my size, “Elephant, Hippo, etc.”.     It is not a shocking thing to say that I developed a certain perception of the image I saw in the mirror each morning.   Hearing myself called by those names often enough, I began to believe I truly was disproportionately oversized.   

As an adult, I look at photos taken of me in that era.   I look amazing.  I don’t look like a side show attraction, I looked healthy, slim with some cushioned curves.  Overweight is not the term I would use looking at the girl in those photos.     My social environment was certainly the cause of my body dysmorphia at the time.     

Wait…what?  Did I say “Body Dysmorphia”?   Had I suffered from a disorder and sudden became cured as I grew older?  The simple answer is “sort of”.   Body Dysmorphic Disorder is a true disease that many suffer from.  People who suffer from this are preoccupied with something about their physical appearance they perceive as a flaw, even when that ‘flaw’ is not observable to others.   

Signs of body dysmorphic disorder include: 

  • Repetitive behaviors, such as compulsive grooming or constantly checking the mirror. 
  • Seeking frequent reassurance from other people about appearance. 
  • Constant stream of anxiety stemming from thoughts about size and appearance.  

I didn’t have any of the repetitve behaviors, I certainly didn’t want reassurance from others about my appearance because I feared they would confirm my fears, and I didn’t have anxiety about it.    What I did have was a horrible misconception of what I truly looked like.   I cannot tell you there was a magic cure because I fear I may still suffer somewhat from it. 

Let me explain.  My teen years are long behind me.   I’ve worked my way through my 20’s, 30’s and 40’s with both weight loss and gain as I navigated the churning waters of my self-worth and learned to love myself.   Life threw a lot of curve balls my way and somehow, I survived and hit my 50’s.    I found myself here, being classified as “obese” on the doctor’s charts.   The word “obese” is like being called names by those popular girls.  Hurtful and damaging to the self-esteem.    My mirror showed a woman who was not worthy to speak to.  I’d forget though, when I was out in public.  I would talk to people and walk with confidence and laugh as if I was actually one of them.  And then I would see my reflection in a window, and I would remember.  

Let’s fast forward to this past year.   I put myself on a health journey and my body has most definitely changed.   I can physically feel the difference, I can see the difference in the mirror and I absolutely know that I am not a freak.    Does this mean I am cured of the body dysmorphia?   I wish it did.     My self-confidence is better than it has been in decades, but something else is going on now and I need to learn how to navigate it.    I don’t understand what size I am. 

That sounds funny, right?   I was a size 24w-26w for a very long time.  Purchasing clothes was easy knowing what size to search for, knowing I couldn’t sit in a restaurant booth because I wouldn’t be able to breathe, understanding that I couldn’t ride on a lot of amusement rides or that stadium seats would be uncomfortable.  When you are big, you accept things and you learn to navigate in the world with this acceptance.   

I lost weight, but I’ve forgotten how to navigate in a world where I am not “obese”.  When I purchase clothes, I make a lot of mistakes and end up with things that are too big.   I hesitate when I am offered a booth at a restaurant, and when I glance at my reflection in a window, I am constantly surprised by what I see.  That isn’t me.   I don’t know that woman like I knew who I was before.    I immediately look for a flaw to focus on, because the flaw is like a warm blanket, comforting to me in this world where I must re-learn how to navigate.   

There are a lot of things people just never talk about when it comes to weight loss and I think its important that we do talk about it.  It might feel insignificant, especially after years of the struggle just to find clothes large enough to fit, yet this is still a thing you must deal with.   I know I cannot be the only one who struggles with this.    

Another goal for my next leg of the journey – adjust my view in the mirror so my perception and view are a closer match!  

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Posted in Emotional Well-Being, Encouragement/Motivation

Let’s Talk About Your Self-Esteem

Posted on by HeatherLynn

                  In the journey of improving oneself, healthier eating choices and exercise are always on the top of the list.  What we tend to neglect to factor in this journey is how our self-esteem affects our journey.

                 Self-esteem is how we perceive and value ourselves.  It walks hand-in-hand with self-confidence.  This perception is influenced by society, by our peers, our families, and most importantly of all, ourselves.     That inner voice that lives inside of us has immense power. 

                 A healthier lifestyle will help boost your self-esteem, but only if you learn how to change your perceptions.  Its not easy.  You are battling a lifetime of negative inner talk.  Standing in front of the mirror berating yourself for every little flaw & allowing others to make you feel like you were less than.   Those days must come to an end.

                 How do you improve your self-esteem and get your self-confidence to an acceptable level? 

  1. Get to know who you are.   What makes you happy?  Do you enjoy going to the beach and collecting shark’s teeth?  Do you like going to thrift shops and finding that perfect vintage item?    Start doing what YOU want to do.  
  • Challenge every unkind thought you have about yourself.   If you think “I’m terrible at baking cookies.”   Find a video with step-by-step instructions, take a class.      If you start to make remarks about your physical appearance, reprimand yourself like you would a child for speaking that way to another person.    Its appalling how we talk to ourselves.
  • Say positive things to yourself.   Every morning look at yourself in the mirror and say one positive thing.   “You have pretty eyes; I like your hair…”  If you aren’t feeling it, still try to pull it off, “You don’t look as tired as you feel.”     Do not allow that inner voice to ruin you.
  • Practice saying “no”.    You don’t have to go along with the crowd, you don’t have to tag along with your spouse to every car show.  You are no one’s servant and you are your own person.   If you don’t want to do something, speak up.   Its liberating. 
  • Try not to compare yourself to others.  Everyone is different, everyone is fighting their own battle.   As Facebook has taught us, people only share their shining moments, and they hide   the things that haunt them in the night.   Worry about yourself, stay in your own lane. 
  • Choose your battles but don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself.   No one deserves to be walked all over, no matter what the situation is.   The more you allow things to happen because you don’t want to have an argument, the more you lose a piece of yourself.   Speak up and get it out on the table.
  • Find new things to try.  The more things you learn to do, the more confident you become.  Take a class on basket weaving, do a paint and sip night, visit a random museum you’ve never been to. 
  • This is probably the most important step.   Change your inner voice from a Negative Nellie to a Positive Polly.   This one takes some work, but the more you stop it from speaking negative to you and change it to talking positive, the more confident you will feel.   The scale numbers aren’t moving as you wish.    Instead of the inner voice berating you, have it say to you, “It’s okay, we just need to change up the formula a bit.  You can do this! “  

Remember, this is a journey, not a sprint!   If you stumble its okay!  Pick yourself up, dust off, and start walking again!

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